One of the things this new lifestyle has given us is time (whatever your beliefs are on whether time exists or not, you know what I mean!)
For as long as I can remember I’ve always been busy – and listening to stories about me as a child from my parents, I have been like that from day one! Always wanting to be doing something – colouring, potato painting, making cakes for dad with pastry that I had played with for an hour before cooking (sorry Dad!) – flitting from one thing to another – I wore my poor mum out! Even when she tried to have a nap I would physically lift up her eyelids to wake her up. I was a demon in an adorable way apparently!
This trait continued into adulthood – after A levels I went to work in a bank, and got promoted through the ranks at lightening speed. Married in haste, repented at leisure, although I was lucky enough to have my son Matt from this marriage. Nine very long years later I met and married the right man, and we’ve been together 24 years next month.
Poor Rog has had to endure my constant flitting during this time, different hobbies, then let’s be medieval traders, watching me more than double my count of qualifications, just for fun. I do have an extremely bizarre CV going from my Financial Planning certificate through to Magical Herbalism! Always busy busy busy, don’t ‘waste’ a minute!
And then I stopped, sat quietly, meditated, and actually thought for once ‘what do I REALLY want my life to be’ – and this is where I’m so lucky to have Rog, because we were on the same page at the same time. Having a little farm was always a dream, and I thought that’s all it would ever be, because I didn’t stop and think about how it could be done – I just saw us trapped in the rat race with no way out. Part of that could’ve been me being a bit scared – making such a massive change seemed so daunting it was maybe easier to keep it a dream…
But here we are. I have found that having time is probably the most precious thing you can have – just to sit and admire the view, to look at the stars, to stop and watch a dragonfly or pretty coloured lizard, to talk to new people, and to just ‘be’ – to exist.
Don’t get me wrong, in between those moments we work hard, then there’s my sewing, reading, baking etc etc etc – I still love all those hobbies! But taking time out just to exist, without guilty feelings of what you should be doing, that’s an art!